Dating - Its Purpose

Dating is mutual investigation of two person of the opposite sex for the purpose of marriage.

Dating is a medium of improving ones status symbol.

Dating is just fun.
I don’t know.

Which of the above options represents your thought? Interestingly, marriage is known throughout the ages as a lasting lodging and a protective umbrella for the family. If children are involved, they find security within the walls of this union. Compare this with children had outside wedlock, who are often insecure. Before entering such a union as marriage, it becomes important to conduct a thorough investigation of each other before entering such a serious contract. An initial step is taken by the intending couple to see if a serious relationship could exist between them. This first step and the activities around it are called dating. As the relationship progresses to a point where mutual commitment becomes involved, the new stage becomes courtship – a more serious relationship. (Courtship will be treated later on its term)

Dating With Marriage in Sight

Nurtured To A Happy Wedlock

Chastity is prominent in dating in the past. In many parts of Nigeria, for example, parents made sure that the romantic relationship of their child is well chaperoned. This ensured that the child does not cross the line he could never return through – the line of virginity. To the Yorubas, it was immoral for ones daughter to allow a man to make advances to her or to hear that his son has made advances to a person of the opposite sex. Under this extreme check, it is the parents that arranged the marriages of their children. Similarly, in the Ishan part of Edo state, dating was somewhat indirect. The male would take a bundle of firewood or cut palm heads and take them to the mother of his girlfriend. This mother would in turn, ask her daughter in question to see him off. But a time is usually prescribed when she would be expected back in the house. This time is normally not long enough for excessive display of affection between the lovers. Offering to work in her father’s farm was another avenue for dating in this part of the country. In this occasion, the girl was allowed to work side by side with her lover. As they work, they could engage in heart to heart discussion. The couple could observe the reaction of each other when under pressure or when tired. They thus could begin to appreciate the attributes of each other. Under these well chaperoned settings, the possibility of improper behaviour before marriage is checked.

In those days, sex before marriage was a disgrace to the clan of resident when it becomes known. And the family of the offender, especially that of the girl, suffered social ostracism to last a life time. Labeled with promiscuous history, it was difficult for other females in the family to find a suitable mate. Today, such alarming claims are no longer very evident. Dating is now a status symbol or just fun.

Increasing, a number of people the world over, now measure their social worth by the caliber of “Babes” they go out with on a dates. It is not uncommon to see unwed couples to be romantically inclined, without objectives other than one-off sex party or perpetual sex party. A number of people date colleagues in the office under this setting. Even some married people do so outside of wedlock

Could Be Prestige

With this unlimited freedom to date, school age children, inexperienced at handling the pressure and the crisis of dating are often seen today in pairs for fun. As a result, at a very tender age, some young ones are already sexually active. This is sad depending on who does the evaluation.

Kids Dating Kids

In the past, dating led to marriage. But entering it for the wrong purpose led to heartbreak or a violation of ones purity. Nowadays however, very few survive to courtship. Still fewer courtships are nurtured to dignified wedlock. Most dating today, lead to heartbreak, self-violation, marital infidelity and vexation.

All in all, the old tradition of dating has survived millennia of human history but not with virtues intact. So, are you dating? Are you ready to date? Do you have a clear purpose in mind? Weigh the matter carefully – the so-called old and outdated or the modern and popular. The choice is yours. Remember to count the cost though. And choose wisely.

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